Originally published on November 10, 2012.
KWAR I AM IN YOU!
So I think I’ve come to a realization. Life is like being a piece of a puzzle. Every section of life is a different puzzle. S when you’re in it, active and everything, you fit.
But when you stop doing someone for a while, your shape changes. Some edges wear down. New cracks or edges appear. And when you try to come back to a part of your life that you’ve not been in for a while, your puzzle piece doesn’t fit the same way in the space that you left behind, because not only are you a different shape, but the hole you left is shaped differently too.
And it takes TIME to fit back in again. That’s the mistake I made 18 months ago, it’s the mistake I made three years ago. It’s a mistake I will try to avoid this time. I miss the SCA, and I want to be back in it, but I can’t be the piece I was ten years ago. I don’t WANT to be the piece I was ten years ago. That piece was an asshole.
So I have to ease back into the puzzle, find my new place, and make sure I fit. I hope what friends I have left in the SCA will help me do that.